Imagine for a moment, Canada put into place their own “Charter of the English Language” due to a growing perceived threat nationally that English was on the decline and warranted protection in Canada.
Canada being surrounded in a sea of Mandarin and Hindi (nearly 3 billion) and Canada’s population at a mere 35 million, we definitely need a law to protect our national language (Canadian English) which is on the decline. For example, cities such as Vancouver have increasingly become more “Mandarin” and cities such as Toronto, have intolerable amounts of Hindi speakers. This needs to STOP. Our solution is to create the “Charter of the English Language.”
The Charter of the English Language will ensure that the English Canadian language version is protected and that anyone living in Canada will speak OUR national language. A language police will be formed. Businesses not conforming, who continue to put up signs containing any other language than Canadian English, will be fined accordingly. Our agents will come into these businesses, photograph/measure all “offending signs” and promptly send a letter asking these businesses to conform to the English language Charter. Store owners will also be encouraged in areas where these languages are spoken, to put up stickers in their windows that read, “Here we shop in English.”
If any of the businesses have trademark names we suggest the following: Adding an English word in front of the sign to make it clear, and in order to limit the risk of Mandarinizing/Cantonizing or Indianizing our language:
Won Ton Soup = Chinese Meat Filled Noodles In Soup
Chow Mein = Stir-fried Chinese Noodles with meat and shrimp
Dim Sum = “Chinese Breakfast” or “Chinese Brunch”
Samosa = “Indian meat/vegetable-filled pastry”
Gulab Jamun = “Syrupy Ball Dessert”
Occasionally these laws may cause Anglophone employees and population to beat up, egg, and refuse to serve the minorities in these cities. But please understand that in general, these are isolated incidents and these “victims” would be better off learning the English National language to avoid offending the population. We are in Canada after all so it is only normal they learn our language. When in Germany, we speak German, right? When in Italy, we speak Italian? So why not speak OUR national language which is Canadian English.
As a matter of fact, we believe that the law is not strong enough and needs more bite. No anglophone Canadian should be taking courses that teach Mandarin/Cantonese or Hindi languages (even as adults), unless one of their parents were native Mandarin or Hindi. We would also like to grant judicial powers to our language minister responsible for the English language to have the power to subpoena and charge any offenders with contempt who refuse to comply with the language law.
These measures need to be put into place ASAP or we risk being assimilated by the Chinese and Indian population. Our national language needs protection.
Sounds very racist doesn’t it? Would this be accepted in Canada? Of course not.
So why is it currently being accepted in Quebec?